Make lemonade.
Or you could just squeeze them into some hot water and detox the crap out of your body. But we’re not talking about actual lemons today. Today, I want to talk about setbacks. We all experience them, all the time. Some are so minor they are almost negligible, like spilling coffee on your shirt and being late to work (weekly occurrences in my life... how bout you?). Some are so huge we don’t think we’ll ever recover. I’m going to start with a personal story. The Lemons. Yesterday I interviewed for a Dietetics & Integrative Medicine fellowship position within my department that I really wanted. I entered the interview with a relatively high level of confidence, but when I came out I felt very different. I knew I didn’t do my best and I had that deep gut feeling that it wasn’t going to end in my favor. I called my mom and told her about the interview with tear-filled eyes (hi mom, I know you're reading). I was ready to accept that I didn’t get the position, but I hoped for the best. I decided to do the one last thing in my control and send a thank you email to the interviewers. When I logged into my email I was shocked to see that I already had an email from them that had arrived in my inbox just 30 minutes after my interview was over. It was their notification that I had not been selected for the position. The sobs began immediately. I spent the rest of the evening crying to my parents and my friends and feeling very down on myself. I overanalyzed everything about the interview including my responses and the interviewers’ reactions, and then I entered in to some dangerous, self-destructive territory. I began to question my worth, my intelligence and every aspect of my education and career path. Then I paused for a second. I asked myself this: if I was already preparing to accept defeat before receiving this email, then why was I so distraught over receiving the actual news of defeat? I think the answer is twofold. The first and more obvious part is due to the image that I had in my head of the interviewers just sitting in the room after I left and simultaneously shaking their heads no. “We regret to inform you that as soon as you walked out of the room we all agreed that you are not good enough.” Now I’m sure this isn’t what happened, but I mean, they didn’t even wait an hour before making the decision, so clearly it was a no brainer; that’s not an easy thought to digest. The second part is a little deeper. Despite my acknowledgement of my poor performance in the interview and my "readiness" to accept defeat, there was inevitably a small part of me that wanted it to work out in my favor anyway. I wanted to check my email a few days later and receive the news that I got chosen, and then all of my doubt would be wiped away and I would feel re-validated as a person and a student. While this outcome certainly would have been great, I realized very quickly to appreciate that it didn't turn out as I'd hoped. The reason for this is because the situation I just described is a mirror of most related situations I’ve experienced. I got accepted to every college I applied to, got offered almost every job I pursued, and had my CHOICE of three dietetic internships; an almost unheard of opportunity considering the placement rate is only 49% nationwide. Okay Michelle stop bragging about how awesome you are, you might be thinking. I promise I'm not telling you these things to brag. Rather, I want to make a point and I promise you will see it soon. I am very fortunate for all of these successes. Don’t get me wrong, they were not handed to me on a silver platter; I had to work very hard to get where I am today. However, I never really had to suffer. What I mean, more specifically, is that I almost never dealt with rejection. Of course I’ve experienced setbacks in my life. Like I said, we all do, all the time. But the feeling that I had last night after not being chosen for a position I applied for is a feeling unfamiliar to me. As much as it stung initially, I became very aware of one thing: setbacks are SO important in life, because they give you an opportunity to grow and learn. The Lemonade. I will not let this disappointment bring me down. I will appreciate the work that I put in and acknowledge the areas that I am still weak. I will work even harder to gain the experiences that I am seeking and learn even more than I thought possible. Most of all, I won’t expect to be a changed human overnight. I will take it step by step and realize that there ARE going to be more setbacks as I progress through the end of my education and beginning of my career. I will work to accept each of these setbacks with as much grace as possible and treat them as blessings rather than curses. I’m using my own personal, current example, but this is an important message and lesson for anyone and everyone because NEWSFLASH: SETBACKS HAPPEN ALL. THE. TIME. Especially in the health and fitness world. Maybe you had a “bad” eating day, or maybe you got sick or injured and can’t work out, or maybe you gained a few pounds during the holidays… and maybe you only have yourself to blame, or perhaps it was completely out of your control. Whatever it may be, it feels humiliating, disappointing, and discouraging when we find ourselves in these positions. You deserve to let yourself feel whatever you feel. You deserve to be upset or be angry. Those emotions are not invalid. But instead of sinking deeper and deeper in to the pool of self-pity, why not stand up, take a step back and realize what a blessing it is to fail? What a blessing it is to feel defeated. Because now, you have an opportunity to get EVEN BETTER. Without failure, we can get complacent. Appreciate your successes and address your shortfalls. Vow to bring yourself up even higher than you were before. Understand that there will be countless setbacks in the future and accept each one as another opportunity to learn, each one as a reminder that you can always get better. You know all the sayings: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”, “Fall down 7 times, get up 8”, "Don't wait for the storm to pass, learn to dance in the rain", etc. They are cliché, but the message behind them is exactly what I’m trying to say. I haven’t always been the best example of this in my own life, I will admit to that. But I’m done with self-pity and complacency. It gets me nowhere. I choose to make those lemons into lemonade, to get back on my feet, to dance in the rain. Won’t you join me? XO, Mish
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Okay. So, I don't actually watch grey's anatomy, which apparently is a crime. A lot of my dietetics friends love it. Especially the girls who adore clinical dietetics...which leads me into my actual topic for this post. Prior to my dietetic internship, the few episodes of "Grey's Anatomy" and "House" etc were the only "clinical experiences" I had.
Now, dietetics can be an extremely challenging field to be in. Our job as RDs (and RD2bes) is (usually) to guide people in making diet and lifestyle changes that will maintain, improve, or manage their health/condition, performance, and/or quality of life. In any practice area of dietetics, this can be a great challenge. Clinical dietetics is no exception, and from my experience, it’s a whole new level of difficulty. I’m three weeks deep into my 16-week clinical rotation of my dietetic internship. I am working in a VA hospital, and so far I’ve spent the whole time in the outpatient clinic. I’ll be honest; I’ve been dreading clinical. I am not particularly confident in my medical nutrition therapy (MNT) skills/knowledge and I’ve found a much greater level of interest in community nutrition and other practice areas. Despite this, I always try to keep an open mind and I was actually excited to find out I would be starting with outpatient because I thought it was the type of clinical work I would like. I learned quickly that it was much more of a challenge than I could have fathomed. The patients that I’ve seen so far are mostly people who have let a poor lifestyle manifest into disease, and who have no desire to do anything to change it. Sure, they might say they want to lose weight or improve their blood sugar, but as soon as you start advising them on ways to achieve their goals, they get defensive and don’t want to take your advice. They are looking for a quick fix to make up for years and years of abusing their body. Unfortunately, that just isn’t the way it works. Spending your whole day around these types of patients is quite taxing. The way I see it, if you don’t want to help yourself, then how am I going to help you? Any dietitian that can break through that severe lack of motivation and make a change in these patients is a superhero in my eyes. So anyway, after spending some time in the outpatient clinic, I started to get a little stir crazy and actually started wishing I was working in the inpatient units. Despite my lack of confidence in my practical MNT skills (I mean I can do totally fine in the classroom but that's so much different than real life), I thought it would be more enriching and rewarding than spending days observing pointless counseling sessions. But then yesterday I had a school-related patient simulation and it didn’t go so well. I felt very incompetent despite extensive preparation and I felt a little bit disheartened. I want to remain as positive and open-minded as I can at all times, but I’m finding it much more difficult lately than I have in the past. I have a high level of respect for clinical dietitians or RD2bes who want to work in this field, because I honestly don’t think I could do it. I just don’t think it is where I’m meant to be, but I’m going to do my best to remain positive through the rest of this experience and absorb as much knowledge as I possibly can. I have to remember that this is all just learning experience. At the end of the day, I value all of it; the ups, the downs and everything in between. It is important to take a step back sometime and look at the bigger picture -- whatever that may mean in your life. Be grateful for the opportunities that you get whether or not they are what you think you want. There is always a lesson to be learned and an opportunity to grow as a student, a professional, or just as a person. Next week I will most likely be starting a new rotation at the hospital and I am ready to take whatever comes my way. MNT skills, get ready to get MASTERED! Keep an eye out for updates as I move through the rest of my clinical rotation! And to all my RD2be friends out there, I LOVE to hear about other's experiences so please comment or send me a message :). Thanks for reading. XO, Mish |
HELLO!I'm so glad you're here! My name is Michelle and I'm a Chicago-based registered dietitian and foodie. I created this blog to share my love of food and wellness with you all, so stay a while! Archives
August 2018
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